Levels of Communication

First of all, I hope everyone who reads this finds themselves, their families, friends and work colleagues safe, healthy and well.

There are so many topics and themes to talk about these days and I find it challenging to determine which topic is best to write about this week, as I have had many interactions that triggered a ‘thought for the week’. 

I have decided to write about two particular interactions I had this week. One around having a truly meaningful conversation and the other on how to have some fun and learn new ideas that will help you, your family and your team during these times and potentially innovate new ideas.

Having meaningful conversations 

I had conversation this week with someone about a topic that one would wonder if they will be ‘crossing the line’ by bringing it up. I even said to the person, please let me know if I am crossing the line. But as I brought up the topic, what followed was a truly meaningful conversation where we both were able to have a real open and truthful dialogue on the topic and we both were appreciative of the time we spent in having this dialogue. Now that the door has opened on the topic, the dialogue will continue to develop and grow as we are now comfortable talking about it.

Why I bring this up is to share something I learned many years ago when I heard Greg Searle a 2012 British Olympian Rower at the age of 40, speak to our executive management team. He spoke about many topics in regards to team building but the one topic that I have kept with me was the topic on Levels of Communication Model (see below). 

When we meet someone for the first time, we will most likely operate at the Ritual or Cliché level. For example it might be about the weather or about our commute. At this level we are really not taking much risk in exposing our true selves, hence we are not building up much trust at this level. As you move up the pyramid or the Level of Communication, you begin exposing more about your true self, your inner beliefs, your opinions and true feelings, and by doing so, you are taking more risk but you are building up critical trust in that relationship. It takes time, a lot of time, and it means respecting each other to effectively move up that pyramid. It also takes events to test the stability of the pyramid. You may think you are operating at a certain level with a certain relationship but are you both in sync on this? Events will test this for you.

The person whom I was having this dialogue with was someone who I was ‘moving up the pyramid’ with over the years, took the time to really listen, get to really know the person and also respecting the stage of where this person was in their life (that could be age, career or other).

By moving up the pyramid of your Level of Communication, in the short run you are taking risks, it will feel uncomfortable but in the long run and especially when it really matters, you are building trust, true relationships and a team.

Remember, the best time to plant a tree was 10 years ago, the second best time to plant a tree is today  Take your time, keep assessing but do not stop building your pyramid until you get to the top. 

Here is a nice TedTalk by Celeste Headlee on 10 Ways to Have a Better Conversation

Mindmaster

This week I participated in a 1-hour workshop hosted by Barry O’Reilly which he calls Mindmaster.

This workshop has a group of people to focus on a challenge that is top of mind for them, in a virtual, highly interactive and extremely fun way. The mission of the session is to offer your skills, share your problems and walk away with two new behaviors to try for the week ahead, while tackling your current challenge(s). We defined problems, articulated outcomes we would like see, solutionized and committed to implementing two new activities or habits based on the workshop – then sharing back what worked, did not and how we go forward. 

The group I was with had never interacted with each other before but we were able to immediately connect and interact in a very open and respectful way. This is a great activity for your team to try out, your family or just yourself. I then did this workshop with my sons with the topic being. ‘how do we stay active during these time and how do we connect on a daily basis’. The outcome from our session was that I have committed to play FIFA with them (I am starting from scratch) and we began a push up contest!!

If you want more details, follow the Mastermind link or contact me through my thought-for-the-week website if you want to understand how it can apply to your team now.

https://thought-for-the-week.com

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